It was well over a year and a half ago, and I was at the Eight Ball with a lady friend who was soon to move on to greener pastures. I know for sure that it was a Tuesday night, because I recall belting out some karaoke Sinatra and the gal performing a surprisingly decent rendition of “Loving You” (It’s easy ‘cause I’m beautiful) while she stared at me as if I was the only person in the room. I’ll gladly tell you I was the envy of more than one of the many guys in the bar that night.
We were outside having a smoke after indulging our inner lounge singer when a twenty something blonde, skinny girl came up and asked us for a light. I surmised from her sweatshirt that she was a student at Sonoma State University just down the street. The place is literally teeming with these types, so if young, dumb and drunk is what you’re into, you’ve come to the right place. Anyway, this one was drunk for sure and the three of us began conversing.
“What are you up to tonight?” my girl asked.
“Whatever I can get into,” Blondie replied. “I'm fuckin’ pissed at my boyfriend."
“Why is that?” I inquired.
“Sonofabitch took off earlier tonight with some other chick. I told him, ‘hey, you’re supposed to be goin’ home with me.’ But he didn’t give a shit. ‘I’m a poon hound and you knew that,’ he told me. ‘We have an open relationship.’ Well fuck him! You know what? I’m a peen hound, and I’m gonna get some dick tonight if it’s the last thing I do!”
“Damn, too bad I’m with somebody,” I chuckled.
“Shut the fuck up, you idiot,” my girl replied.
And this pretty much sums it up for the Eight Ball. You will be hard pressed to find a bar before Berkeley to the south and Eureka to the north with more young, drunk chicks looking to get laid. In addition, the drinks are stiff and cheap, the bartenders are relatively friendly, (Brett is an especial favorite of mine) the juke box is well stocked and the pool tables are straight and clean. And yeah, it’s a dive. So you’ll feel right at home.
The only thing I can’t understand is why I’ve never been able to score coke at a place called the Eight Ball.
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